Parenting is challenging and frustrating. It’s hard to know if you’re doing the right things and making wise choices that will benefit your children. It can sometimes feel like there’s no good answer for many of the parenting situations you find yourself in.
In parenting, as in the rest of life, perfection isn’t a possibility. Figure out your values and allow them to guide you instead!
Use these tips to accept that you don't need to be perfect!
1. Figuring out your values. You learn a lot of things when you become a parent but often it can feel overwhelming, take some time to figure out your parenting values, ask yourself these questions
2. Learn from parents around you. Whether the parents you have observed and possibly your own were spectacular, mediocre, or terrible, there is something that you can learn from them.
3. Ask for feedback from your children. Tell your kids that you want to be a better parent and ask for advice. Ask them what you could do better. A lot of the information you’re given won't be helpful, but there will be a few gold nuggets of advice in there. You might hear a few things you’ve never considered.
4. Ignore the opinions. Everyone you meet will have an opinion about how to better parent children. Plenty of those people will give you advice without you asking for it. Everyone likes to be an armchair spectator. Consider their feedback but make your own decision about whether to implement their ideas and link back to your values.
5. Cover the basics. These may be basic, but that doesn’t mean that they’re easy! Do your best to ensure that your kids see these concepts in action.
6. Accept challenges as an opportunity. Children benefit from the support of an adult to show that challenges and tricky situations will happen but they can also be overcome. This is a truly amazing life skill.
7. Read. Parenting is one of the most researched areas of study in the world. There are a lot of great books that all parents can read and use, I love the how to talk to kids collection.
No parent can be perfect. You’re doomed to feel like a failure if perfection is your goal. Fortunately, kids are quite resilient and don’t require perfect parenting. Keep doing your best and living by your values rather than a set of rules.